Sunday, June 27, 2010

Ard Boyz Finals here I come

It looks like I will be going to the Ard Boyz finals again this year after taking 1st place in both round one and two. I'm hoping to take home the top prize this year and I feel im in a great position to do so. I have stepped my game up a lot in the last year and I feel that my new knowlege of the game will put me in the position to call myself an Ard Boy.

My girlfriend Tiffany and my firend mike will be going with me this year and im sure we will all have a great time. Mike is also planning on playing in the finals after taking 2nd place in NY.
This year that sword shall be mine!
Peachykeen out!

Sunday, February 21, 2010


This week is exam week so I will not be posting anything for this week good news though is that I have been doing some practice for Ard Boyz and ill have some battle reports and ideas coming the following week.

Monday, February 8, 2010

Got Ideas?

So here is an invitation to anyone that has ideas.

What would you like to talk about? Its up to you.

Simply put a topic in the comments sections and we will have a conversation about it.

Coming soon!

-Making a solid Tournament list at any points level

- What to look out for at Ard Boyz 2010 & how to come out on top

- Beating the pesky Tournament Guard

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Don’t be a Douche


I’m writing this because this weekend at the tournament I went to there was a dreaded Douche. Sadly he came with the 10 of us from Peterborough. We all knew from playing with him at the shop that he was not the best guy in the world but we had hopes that he would be able to contain himself long enough to not make himself look like an ass. Sadly we were wrong. I bet right now you are saying to yourself “I bet it’s not that bad”. If you are thinking that THEN YOU’RE WRONG! Here is a list of a few things that this nameless person did during the Tournament. (Lets use this as a what NOT to do) For the sake of protecting names we will call him Mr.Douche.

The first game was going well and we all had hopes. They won the game and there was nothing that was reported to any of us. We have to assume that he was lubing up for the dreaded Douche insertion.

Second game came along and they found themselves losing. So Mr.Douche would not hear of it. He would contest every dice roll. He would have the dreaded Douche look on his face every time the other team took out there tape measure. He would remind you to take your saves and to allocate about five times before you had a chance to roll a dice. There is a lot more but just use your imagination and just think of everything you would not want to happen to you. Got it in your head? Now imagine all of it happening all at the same time from Mr.Douche. He annoyed the team that he played against so much that they quit the game. That’s right… They were beating Mr.Douche’s team and they said screw it. They had no desire to finish the game. They would rather quit and walk away. I’m sure they did this because they would have punched him in his face if they did not. Picture a 17 year old young man screaming at you at the top of his lungs. I think you might want to quit too.

So Mr.Douche is happy with his win in the second round. By now maybe he is thinking “Hey I can win this if I annoyed the last guy to” BUT NO! He wouldn’t do it again would he? He wouldn’t freak out so much that someone would punch him would he? It looked like it was going to go that way to be honest. Mr.Douche’s team was on the wire again and he went for the “I win button” They were not falling for the tricks of the super Douche though. It got pretty intense though. I thought that he was going to get punched… Mr.Douche was yelling and screaming so much he was sweating. He had beats of sweat dripping down from his face. Can you imagine someone freaking out so much that they would be sweating in the middle of winter in a poorly heated room? It happened… I was there and seen it with my own two eyes.

So what’s the result of acting like this you might ask. There are a lot of things that COULD happen when people act this way. Keep the following things that DID happen in mind if you ever find yourself being a Douche, but I know that people that read my Blog are not Douche’s (Yes I’m sucking up to you).

1. Because of Mr.Douches actions he is no longer welcome to attend any Tournament being held in Parry Sound.

2. Mr.Douche does not have a car. No one in Peterborough wants to drive him to Tournaments anymore.

3. Everyone at the club was very upset about the actions of Mr.Douche. There is talk of not allowing him to come anymore. We can’t just say you can no longer come to the shop anymore though. We are not the owners obviously that’s for him to decided. What can we do though? No one at the shop is going to play him again.

4. We thought about talking to Mr.Douche and trying to help him change but I don’t know how many people want to try. This is not the first time that he freaked out and made an ass out of himself. The sad part is that Mr.Douche is not a bad player. He knows the game pretty well. It goes to show you that it does not matter how good you are if you are a dick no one will want to play you, and like Mr.Douche found out you will be stuck in the corner playing with yourself.


So please follow this simple rule. DON’T BE A DOUCHE! Think about the person that is standing across from you. They are there to have fun too. They want to play the game and have a good time just like you.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Ard Boyz 2010 List

I have been fooling around with an IG list and I think I might bring it to this years Ard Boyz. I'm not 100% sure yet but if the Angels Codex is not out yet I may bring this to Ard Boyz 2010. If the Angels codex is out then i'll be bringing them because Blood Angels are my babies. Its a pretty evil list and I think I have everything covered. I don't see it giving anyone an easy win. It should be able to plow through anyone that I meet.

HQ 1 Company Command Squad
Composition: 1 Company Commander, 4 Veterans, 1 Officer of the Fleet, Astropath
Upgrades: Chimera W/ Multi-laser & Heavy Flamer, 4 Plasma Guns, Plasma Pistol
Total Points: 235

Elite 1 - Daemonhunters Inquisitor
Composition: 1 Inquisitor, 2x Familiar, 2x Hierophant & 2x Mystics
Upgrades: Chimera W/ Multi-Laer & Heavy Flamer, Psychic Hood, Emperor's Tarot
Total Points: 180

Elite 2 Pskyer Battle Squad
Composition: 1 Overseer & 9 Sanctioned Psyker
Upgrades: Chimera W/ Multi-Laser & Heavy Flamer
Total Points: 165

Troop 1 Veteran Squad
Composition: 1 Veteran Sergeant & 9 Veterans
Upgrades: Chimera W/ Multi-laser & Heavy Flamer, 3 Meltaguns
Total Points: 155

Troop 2 Veteran Squad
Composition: 1 Veteran Sergeant & 9 Veterans
Upgrades: Chimera W/ Multi-laser & Heavy Flamer, 3 Meltaguns
Total Points: 155

Troop 3 Veteran Squad
Composition: 1 Veteran Sergeant & 9 Veterans
Upgrades: Chimera W/ Multi-laser & Heavy Flamer, 3 Meltaguns
Total Points: 155

Troop 4 Veteran Squad
Composition: 1 Veteran Sergeant & 9 Veterans
Upgrades: Chimera W/ Multi-laser & Heavy Flamer, 3 Meltaguns
Total Points: 155

Troop 5 Veteran Squad
Composition: 1 Veteran Sergeant & 9 Veterans
Upgrades: 3 Meltaguns
Total Points: 100

Troop 6 Veteran Squad
Composition: 1 Veteran Sergeant & 9 Veterans
Upgrades: 3 Flamers
Total Points: 85

Fast Attack 1 Valkyrie Assault Carrier Squadron
Composition: 1 Valkyrie Assault Carrier
Upgrades: 2 Multiple Rocket Pods, Multi-Laser
Total Points: 130

Fast Attack 2 Vendetta Gunship Squadron
Composition: 1 Vendetta
Upgrades: None
Total Points: 130

Fast Attack 3 Hellhound Squadron
Composition: 1 Hellhound
Upgrades: Smoke launchers, Extra Armour, Heavy Flamer
Total Points: 150

Heavy Support 1 Hydra Flak Tank battery
Composition: 3 Hydra Flak Tank battery
Upgrades: 3 Heavy Bolters
Total Points: 225

Heavy Support 2 Manticore Rocket Launcher
Composition: 1 Manticore Rocket Launchers
Upgrades: Heavy Bolter
Total Points: 160

Heavy Support 3 Medusa Ordnance Battery Tanks
Composition: 2 Medua Ordnance Battery Tanks
Upgrades: Enclosed Crew Compartment,Bastion-Breacher Shells, 2 Heavy Bolters
Total Points: 310

Return to Hellmouth Round 3

Round 3

This mission was from round 1 Ard Boyz. It was spear head with two objectives placed in the corners that no team started in. This was for all the marbles. Both teams had way more points then anyone else there. They were only split by a single point. Winner would be in 1st place and the loser would be in 3rd place. It was an intense battle from the get go. Both teams were from Peterborough and we knew each other very well. Jon and I knew that we had the intimidation factor on our side because of how intense they were from the very start. Jon and I have a rep around the shop because I'm a person that loves tournaments and works hard to be prepared for any army that I may play against and Jon is a math wiz with crazy tactics. We knew before the game that they tailored there list to try to beat ours because we were going to be the team they would be playing in the finals if they made it that far. There list was brutal. By turn 3 it turned into “ lets just not give them the massacre ”.

Eldar & Space Marines

Farseer W/ Fortune, Doom, RoWa, Spirit Stones, Jetbike

9 Warlocks on bikes W/ 3 destructors, 1 enhance, and 2 embolden

6 jetbikes W/ 2 cannons

6 jetbikes W/ 2 cannons

5 shining spears W/ skilled rider

SM Captain on bike with Lightning claws

Command squad W/ Company Champion, melta gun and a Rhino

5 man SM Bike Squad W/ Power fist, meltagun and Multi-Melta Attack Bike

5 man SM Bike Squad W/ Power fist, meltagun and Multi-Melta Attack Bike

6 man scout squad W/ CC weapons, 1 Power Weapon and a Combi Melta

3 Multi-melta Attack Bikes

Venerable Dreadnought in a drop pod W/ heavy flamer

There was no doubt in our mind that this army was going to be on us very fast. Our only hope was to get first turn and try to do as much damage as we could before they all turbo boosted and slammed into us turn 2. The die roll was not in our favor from the start when they took turn 1. We knew that this was going to take some very good tactics on our part to stand any chance of winning. Could we do it though? It seemed like we might not have a chance in hell of winning after they deployed. We knew that there was only a 24 inch game from there deployment zone to ours so there turbo boost would bring them close enough to get the turn 2 assault. After a smart plan we made the choice to huddle in the corner and make lines that they would have to slam into in order to win. We just hoped that we would be able to kill off enough before they got to the back. We left two of our Devilfish in reserve. The hope was to draw them into the corner long enough that they would not be able to get back to the objective and we might have a chance of holding the one in the far end of our side.

There turn 1: After some mind tricks in our deployment we managed to trick them into putting there dreadnought close enough to our inquisitor that we would get a shot off. The Eldar player warned him not to but the thought of flaming our pathfinders to death seemed to be to tempting for him to pass up. We managed to get a shot off on him and blew off his flamer and stunned him for the turn with the Vendetta. There entire army turbo boosted up as far as they could. Lucky for us the inquisitor shut down Fortune on the seers so they held them back a little more then they might have.

Our turn 1: We moved a few units up to give them something to attack on there turn and hopefully slow them down. The medusa's fire into the shining spears that were in the front of the pack but only managed to kill one of them and two bikes. Jon's broadside finished off the dreadnought and we got one of the bike squads down to only 3 members. Jons Tau commader used his air burst on the scouts and managed to kill a few but It was a lot less then hoped. We knew that if we were to stand a chance in this fight we had to have a better turn one then we did.

There turn 2: There shining spears slammed into the devilfish that we left out for them to eat up. They only managed to stun it and immobilize it though so we knew that we had a chance. A squad of the SM bikes charged the medusa's killing one of them and making the other unable to shoot for a turn. The 3 jetbike eldar that we left alive charged a devilfish and stunned it. His attack bike squad killed the valkyrie and the rest of his army got close enough that they would be in close combat the next turn. His seers were only about 9 inches away from most of our units at this point so they would be a problem next turn.

Our turn 2: We knew that this was time we had to bring the pain. I brought up my command squad and the melta vets and managed to almost wipe out the bike squad that charged the meduas's All that was left behind was a normal guy and a power fist. This was still scary because it was in range to charge anything in our army that it wanted. We finished off the rest of the jetbike squad and manged to wipe out the other jetbike squad also. Things were looking up for us in the battle but we knew on there turn loses would be huge for us.

There turn 3: The inquisitor was still pulling his wait because he was able to shut down fortune again for us but it was starting to look ugly with how close everything was. His seer council did a triple assault against two of our devilfish and a squad of 6 fire warriors. They blew up both of the tanks but were unable to kill the fire warriors. They held on for another round. Jon and I were a little upset about this because we would not be able to shoot at them but this ended up being the best thing that ever happened to us. The two last marines in the bike squad charged a broadside squad killing them but losing the normal bike leaving the fist all alone. The shining spears charged the pathfinders wiping them out and making a chimera unable to move or shoot for another turn. They managed to destroy the other medusas because they knew the damage it could cause. They attempted to kill the command squads Chimera with there full bike squad but were unable to do any damage. They also made it so the Vendetta would not be shooting on our next turn with there attack bike squad. We did not have a lot on the board and we knew things were looking ugly for or team.

Our turn 3: At this point our main goal was to not give up the massacre if we could. We had no dreams of winning but Jon and I are both stubborn bastards that never give up hope. Our two devilfish came in and one of them stayed back at the objective that no one was close to. Our plan worked. We would be able to contest this objective if the seer council was unable to kill the devilfish in a turn. We knew that time was running out for the round and we only had one turn left then the unthinkable happened. The fire warriors held another round against the Seer council. We couldn't believe our eyes We managed to hold. THE OBJECTIVE WAS OURS NOW! They would be unable to contest it. A glimmer of hope came out of no were. Could we pull this off? Was it possible? We only had a hand full of kill points on them so we would not be able to get the massacre but if we could some how contest that other objective we would pull off a major win. If we could not then we would only give up a major loss so we knew that win or lose it was not a complete slaughter. I went flat out with my vendetta towards there objective with a squad of flamer vets inside. There goal was simple try to get with in 3 inches of that objective. We managed to finish off the biker with the fist but they still had an attack bike and a normal biker left after all of our shooting. We pumped all our shots into them trying to kill them but sadly could not. Our tau commander charged the Shining spears that were close enough to the vendetta to charge it on there turn if we could not tie them up. Lucky for us the tau commander did not die. We had hope.

There turn 4 (final turn): They turbo boosted there 2 remaining SM bikes close to there objective and parked the Rhino on top of it. They go out with there command squad and tried to make a wall. They put there scouts in the Rhino for added protection. We had a few ideas in our head but it was not going to be ez to get to that objective in one turn. They brought there attack bikes up to shoot down the vendetta. They also brought the Sm captain to try to finish it off if the bikes failed. They shot the multi-melta's at the Vendetta.. Cover saves made (thank god). They charged it and blew it up in the assault phase. We had one less option for getting to that objective but there was still hop. We noticed a whole in there wall big enough to fit a base through. With the right run we might be able to make it through.

Our turn 4 (final turn): The command squads Chimera moved up 12 inches and exposed rear Armour and the command squad got out. We had a glimmer of hope. We were only 8 inches away from the objective. If we could get a run of 5 we had it. We would have the Major win. We were only 50% sure a base would fit in the whole that we had though. We were not sure if we could fit one in there. It was going to be close as hell. The vet's that were in the blown up Vendetta got out and went into DT to try to get a charge on the Rhino. If they could get a 6 on the DT and a 6 on the charge we would be with in 3 inches of the objective. It was not going to be easy but we had hope. We shot everything we had with hopes of making the hole a little bigger for the guard to get into but with what we had left there was just not enough guns to get the job done. The wall of SM was still pretty intact and it was iffy if we could fit the model through the gap. The vets did it. They got a 6 on there DT. Now it was the moment of truth. Could we make it. The command squad ran and managed to get a 5. The tape measures cam out by all four of us trying to see if we could fit a model into the gap. I told everyone to make sure no models were touched or I would claim cheating because of how close it was. I told them to make sure they are careful because the game would be deiced with this simple measuring. If they could fit we had a major win... If they could not we had a minor lose. After about 4-5 minutes of debate and measuring trying to see if they could fit I simply said okay ill roll my charge against the Rhino and we wont have to worry if they fit or not... THERE IT WAS A 6. WE HAD THE GAME... If you was wondering the models did fit in the game. We looked for the hell of it.

We got 18 points for this round.

We were awarded 1st place and the other team managed to sneak into 3rd place. It was a great tournament that I will remember for a very long time. The last game of the tournament was an amazing game that we had to work very hard in to pull off the win. It goes to show people that you should never give up when you are playing because you truly don't know in an objective game what they outcome will be till the game is over. We went from trying not to give up a massacre to pulling off an amazing win in the closest game I have ever played. I would like to thank Tammy again for running a fun tournament that all of us enjoy going to every year. We will see you next year and win or lose I'm sure we will have a blast.

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Return to Hellmouth Round 2

Round 2

They used the 2nd mission from the 2nd round of Ard Boys. Its dawn of war and its night fight only turn one (the Ard boyz was the whole game but they changed it) There are 6 objectives on the board BUT only 3 of them are real. On turns 2,3 and 4 you roll a dice to see what objectives are the real ones.

Space Wolfs & Space Marines

Space Wolfs:

HQ: Wolf Guard Battle Leader, Mount, Frost Weapon, Storm Shield,

Troop 1: 5 Grey Hunters in a Razorback W/ Twin Linked Heavy Bolter

Troop 2: 5 Grey Hunters in a Razorback W/ Twin Linked Assault Cannon

Troop 3: 5 Grey Hunters in a Razorback W/ Twin Linked Assault Cannon

HQ: Rune Priest W/ Chooser of the slain, Jaws of the world wolf & Living Lightning

Fast Attack: Thunderwolf Cavalry W/ 1 Power Fist, 1 Storm Shield

Fast Attack: Thunderwolf Cavalry W/ 1 Power Fist, 1 Storm Shield

Space Marines:

HQ: Vulkan

Troop 1: Tac Squad W/ Meltagun, Multi-melta, Drop Pod and a Power Weapon

Troop 2: Tac Squad W/ Meltagun, Multi-melta, Drop Pod and a Power Weapon

Troop 3: Tac Squad W/ Meltagun, Multi-melta, Drop Pod and a Power Weapon

Elite 1: Dreadnought W/ Multi-melta and drop pod

Elite 2 6 Sternguard W/ 3 Combi-melta, 1 Power fist in a Razorback W/ TW Lascannon

We felt pretty good about this game going into it. They did not have a lot of speed or a lot of long range fire power. Good old Emperor's Tarot helped us get first turn. It was Dawn of war so we made sure we pushed them back so we had that extra time to get some shots off. We managed to push them back the max distance we could in a pretty good area. The rest of our army deployed really close together so that if they tried to deep strike and melta important things they would die before they got to shoot because of the Mystics. We left one of the devilfish far away from the rest of the army to bait them in. They deployed there Rune Priest and two squads of gray hunters.

Our turn 1 (night fight): One of the Chimera's was close enough to the Rhino with the Rune Priest in it that We thought we might as well sacrifice it to get a search light on the Rune Priests Rhino. The other two Chimera's that we deployed moved back to join the rest of the army. We managed to pop the Rune Priests Rhino but were out of range of everything else because of night fight.

There turn 1 (night fight): Everything came on and they deployed over the whole table. They wanted to have a good range of access to the counters for this missions. They charged the Chimera with one of there thunderwolf squads and ripped it apart pretty fast. There dreadnought dropped down and took some shots at the devilfish that we put away from the group just to see what they did. Lucky for us the melta missed. They also dropped the squad with the melta gun and multi-melta in it close to the dreadnought. They did this for two reasons they were just shy of 24” away from the inquisitor and because there were two objectives pretty close to there. One of them ended up being one of the real ones at the end of the game too so it turned out to be a good idea. The marines that dropped down managed to stun one of my Chimera's.

Tun 2 Roll: The first objective that we rolled turned out to be on there side of the board right were one of the squads of thunderwolfs, there Rune Priest /W a squad of gray knights and vulken and the sternguard came on. Jon and I where not happy about this but we figured its still early.

Our turn 2: We knew that this is when we could bring some pain because the best armor they had was AV 11. ( drops pods don't count lol ) Jon placed one of his broadside squads in position so he was able to get back armor on the dreadnought and we moved all his devilfish but one in range of the newly dropped marines. The medusa's also looked over at the new marines and the valk did the same. Jons other squad of broadsides destroyed one of there other rhino and my vendetta did the same. Jons devilfish was hiding behind a building but in range of the thunderwolf cavalry that killed our Chimera so he used his smart missile system and managed to kill one and they failed there moral test and almost ran off the board. I think it was like 1 ½ inches away from running off. We killed the dreadnought and put every shot we had left into the newly dropped marines. We wiped out one squad and left the other squad with only one basic marine left. We were very happy with this turn because they were still really far away from us and they seemed to be holding back with there cavelry. This was a smart move on there part though because they played the mission.

There turn 2: There final drop pod came down so they decided to drop it down close to there other drop pods to keep us busy. We knew this was there plan but we were not to worried about it. We figured that our devilfish and melta guns from the command squads would be able to handle that corner so we could start dropping pie plates on the Rune Priest and his friends. They dropped down and immobilized the Command squads chimera and did little else.

Turn 3 objective roll: The roll sucked again for us because it was close to the Rune Priest, Vulcan and the wolfs.

Our turn 3: My Chimera W/ the flamer squad started to make its way to there Rune Priests corner of the table. The medusa's, one of the devil fish, my Vendetta and a squad of broadsides joined them. We put down a lot of fire power so they made the choice to try to go to ground and try to just hold out till last tern because they knew as long as they had the wolfs hiding over there we could not get close with out getting slaughter. We managed to kill ½ the wolfs 3 out of 5 of the tac squad and get a wound on the Rune Priest because we fired almost everything at them. The other broadside team managed to finish off there last razorback leaving most of there team scattered in the middle of no were. We used the devil fishes and the melta's in the command squad to get there drop poding squad down to 5 guys (they still had a melta gun though).

There turn 3: They moved the drop podded close enough to a devilfish to pop it open and it blew up. Jon not listening to my advice put them close to the front of the blown up tank and his fire warriors ended up being assaulted and killed by the marines. No big lose but it could have been prevented. The squad of wolfs that was not close to the Rune Priest went behind cover for what we could only assume would be a last turn rush for the objective to kill anything we might have contesting over at the drop pod graveyard.

Turn 4 objective roll: It turned out to be the objective that was surrounded by 3 drop pods and very hard for us to get at because the wolfs were very close and with in assault range. Our idea was to just rush the objective last turn with a devilfish, the Tau HQ and a chimera and hope that they would not be able to kill all three in one turn.

Our turn 4: This was a good turn for us. We managed to kill the rest of the tac squad that held up with the Rune Priest and we managed to finish off Vulcan and friends (str10 AP1 on Vulcans head hurts) We also finished off the wolfs so there was only a Rune Priest in our way of holding that objective. I dropped off a squad of vets to melta a squad of space marines that started to head over to the objective close to the Rune Priests objective but sadly I only killed one. I was not impressed.

There turn 4: There wolfs came out to play. They managed to eat my command squad and were very close to the objective. They had a tac squad walking up to that objective and we had no doubt that they would be there by turn 6. We knew we had to push that corner hard after the vets failed to kill the marines. We knew that we had one objective for sure but the other two were very iffy. The marines that I failed to melta to death charge the vet squad and killed them in assault. They were close enough to the other objective that they would be there In 1 turn if not stopped. We had to slow them down at all costs.

Our turn 5: We moved a devilfish onto the objective that the Rune Priest had and pointed all of our broadsides at him. After removing his cover saved we put a railgun into his head and managed to one shot him with ease. The Objective was ours. All of our guns pointed at the drop pods Objective while I used a Chimera the vendetta and the chimera to make a wall on the objective that the marines started to head to. Lucky for wall was pretty long so they had no way of getting there before the game would end. The medusa's managed to wipe out a tac squad that was heading for the drop pods objective but there was still a few marines that could hold that objective. We knew that we only had one turn to drive as many things on it as we could because we were not 100% sure the wall would hold at the other objective. If they blew up the valk or Vendetta on turn 5 then they may have been able to contest that objective with the marines if they got a good run. We had to make sure the drop pod objective was contested at the end of the game.

There turn 5: There wolfs charged and immobilized the inquisitors Chimera. This was bad for us because we knew that we would only have a frail command and a devilfish on that objective to try to hold for the final turn to contest. There marines got close enough to charge the valk and vendetta but missed there DT roll ( thank god the win was ours and we knew it ). There was now no way they could contest that objective so we knew we would win either 2-1 or 2-0 depending on the drop pods objective.

Our turn 6: The devilfish and the commander both moved with in 3 inches of there objective. It was all up to them to hold the objective for one more turn. We shot everything we had left at any troop choices they had over there but they still managed to have 4 marines alive and the wolfs.

There turn 6: They felt pretty good about the marines power first being able to take out the Tau commander so they sent all the wolfs against the Tau devilfish. Sadly they were unable to kill either. The marines close to the valk and vendetta charged but were also unable to kill anything. The game ended 2-0 for us.

We got 22 Points for this round.

Round 3 coming soon

Return to Hellmouth Round 1

On Saturday January 30th 2010 10 brave souls from Peterborough embarked on a journey that would be full of bloodshed and tears.

Here in Peterborough we have a very diverse group of players that all bring their own ideas and tactics to the game. We managed to rally up 10 of these people for a tournament in Perry Sound on Saturday. It was a doubles tournament using the Ard Boyz point scheme. I decided to team up with my good buddy Jon. We are two very unique players and we share our love of strange and unique tactics that leave your opponent wondering what the hell happened. Sadly our list is pretty hardcore (it is an Ard Boyz tournament after all) but as Jon would say “Half of us are Tau, so give us a break”

I would love to give a shout out to Tammy in Perry Sound and thank her for a great time. Return to Hellmouth is a Doubles Tournament that they hold every year at the Don Cherry’s up there and after attending last year I knew that I would be returning every year after. Perry Sound has some of the best people you can meet in the world. They are always there to lend a hand and they are friendly as friendly can be. Any more friendly and they would be Pod people.

For this Tournament teams share a force organization chart. Each person has to bring 1 HQ and 1 Troop after that each can bring up to 1 Fast Attack/Elite/Heavy and there is also a floating slot that can be used. Only one team member may use each floating spot so for example you can’t both take an extra Heavy Support but one of you can take an extra Heavy Support and one of you take an extra Fast Attack.

Our List:

Imperial Guard (Peachykeen)

HQ 1 Company Command Squad

Upgrades: Chimera W/ Multi-Laser & Heavy Flamer, 3 Meltaguns, Regimental Standard, Krak Grenades

Total Points: 215

Why? I’m sure that everyone would agree that Company Command Squad is always a solid choice for the guard. Being able to have four plasma or meltas all with BS4 is something to drool over and let’s not forget about the dreaded Officer of the Fleet. If you reserve with this bad boy on the table chances are your coming in piece by piece and against guard that’s exactly how we want you. The regimental Standard is for Jon. He had the worry of his Broadsides taking some heavy fire and with only a four man squad if one dies then they have to take a dreaded LD7 test and that’s never fun. We all know how easy it is to make Loota’s run like a fat kid after an ice cream truck. We are only worried about keeping the Broadsides on the table for about two turns because after that chances are they have helped kill any threat that they are required to kill.

Elite 1 - Daemonhunters Inquisitor W/ two Hierophants & two Mystics

Upgrades: Chimera W/ Multi-laser & Heavy Bolter, Psychic Hood, Emperor's Tarot

Total Points: 168

Why? HELL WHY NOT? I personally think they need to make a Faq saying you can no longer us them in Guard armies. For about 83 points (if you don’t bring a Chimera) you get a LD10 Psychic Hood that works for the entire board, You make deep striking close to you a suicide mission, AND you have a better chance of getting turn 1. We brought this bad boy for a few reasons. First one is Eldar. They are a strong army and this will help to shut down their Psychic powers. A Seer Council on bikes without Fortune is most likely a dead one. Another reason is the dreaded drop pod lists. Normally there is not a lot of fear from this but if they drop 3 Ironclad or Venerable Dreadnoughts turn one right in our face that could be something that would scare the hell out of us. With the Mystics chances are those dreadnoughts are dead before they even shoot at us “thnx for the Kill Points”.

Troop 1 Veteran Squad

Upgrades: Chimera W/ Multi-Laser & Heavy Flamer, 3 Meltaguns

Total Points: 155

Why? 3 BS4 meltaguns in a Chimera. Enough Said.

Troop 2 Veteran Squad

Upgrades: Chimera W/ Multi-Laser & Heavy Flamer, 3 Flamers

Total Points: 140

Why? We knew that one of the teams going was going to have 45 Lootas so we thought to our self “If we get turn one and drive the valk with the 3 flamers inside of it into the heart of the Orcs then we can kill a squad of lootas (or most of them) with the Valk and another squad (or most of them) with the 3 flamers. We also figured our AT was already pretty solid and we wanted another way to deal with horde armies.

Fast Attack 1 Vendetta Gunship Squadron

Total Points: 130

Why? 3 twin linked lascannons that can either outflank, Deep strike or scout in AV12 for only 130 points. It can also move 24” and get a cover save a turn for the last minute rush for the win. There is really NOTHING bad about this unit.

Fast Attack 2 Valkyrie Assault Carrier Squadron

Upgrades: 2 Multiple Rocket Pods, Multi-Laser

Total Points: 130

Why? Ah yes the Vendetta’s brother. It has all the same strengths as the Vendetta but it’s for the times we need to pwn some horde instead of tanks. Being able to move 12” and still fire a 3 shot str 6 weapon and drop two Str 4 pie plates is nothing to overlook.

Heavy Support 1 Medusa Ordnance Battery

Upgrades: Enclosed Crew Compartment, 2 Heavy Bolters

Total Points: 300

Why? Two Str10 AP2 Pie plates a turn with range 36. It’s hard to say no to that if you ask me. This is for a lot of things really. Nobs, Terminators, and even normal Space Marines. One of the problems tau face right now is they don’t have any AP. They have a lot of str 5 shots but there AP is pretty lacking so that’s what the guard are here for. The Tau kill the tanks and the Guard help clean up and get in the way.

Tau (Jon)

HQ 1 Commander Shas'el

Upgrades: Twin-linked Flamer, Arbursting Fragmentation, HW Multi Tracker

Total Points: 81

Why? In Jon’s words this is the “I have to take an HQ. HQ.” Im not going to lie it does have its moments for instance we played one game where it came down turn two from Deep Strike and killed a full squad of lootas and then went on to cause a distraction.

3 squads of Fire Warriors all the same

Composition: 6 Fire Warriors

Upgrades: Devilfish Troop Carrier, Disruption Pod, Multi-tracker, Targeting Array, Smart Missile System

Total Points: 180x3 = 540

Why? Let’s be honest after the broadsides and the Pathfinders the tau are not bringing that much to the table. The Devilfish’s bring some pretty good fire Str 5 fire power and being able to have a cover save from anything 12” or more away makes them a great unit to get in front of my Heavy Support so I can get them a cover save. Once we take out the other player’s mobility the Fire Warriors move in and help lay down some fire power. They are also our main Objective holder because people are a lot more worried about killing the Guard then the Tau and we know this. We went into this tournament knowing that the Guard will be taking most of the shots.

Fast Attack 1 Pathfinder Team

Composition: 8 Pathfinders

Upgrades: Devilfish Troop Carrier, Disruption Pod, Multi-tracker, Targeting Array, Smart Missile System, Decoy Launchers

Total Points: 221

Why? Oh sorry did you smoke? Oh your 50% covered? Well let’s just get rid of that cover save while my Str10 AP1 Rail Guns put a whole the size of a house through your tank. That’s pretty much their job. Simple remove cover saves for the broadsides and if the dice are on our side give them better BS also.

Heavy Support 1 & 2 Broadside Battle Suit Team (Both are two man squads with 2 Shield Drones)

Composition: 2 Broadside Battle Suits

Upgrades: Team Leader W/ HW Target Lock, HW Drone Controller, 2 Shield Drones, HW Blacksun Filter, 2 Advanced Stabilization Systems

Total Points: 203x2 = 406

Why? Nothing pops an AV 14 tank better then a STR10 AP1 Rail Gun to the face of the driver. These suckers pop tanks for fun. Yes it would be great if they were ordnance but can we really have it all? That’s pretty much their job and they do it without flaw. The sad part is they are only LD7 so if one of those shield drones dies then they are taking a Leadership test. We brought a Standard to help us keep them on the table for the first two or three turns. After that they are on their own.

All in all we have a solid doubles list that works well together. We had about ten practice games to get the synergy down and I was pretty happy that we did because there were some pretty solid lists at the tournament. So without further ado our Battle report.

Round 1:

This Mission was kill Points with modifications. The modifications were; Troops = 3, HQ = 1, Fast Attack/Elite/Heavy = 2, Dedicated Transports = 1

Dark Eldar + Tau

HQ - Lelith W/ 6 Wytches and a Succubus in a raider dark lance

Troop 1 – 8 Wyches and 1 Succubus in a raider with a dark lance

Troop 2 - 8 Wyches and 1 Succubus in a raider with a dark lance

Troop 3 - 7 Wyches and 1 Succubus in a raider with a dark lance

Fast Attack 1 – 3 Jetbikes and 1 Succubus ( 2 blasters )

Fast Attack 1 – 3 Jetbikes and 1 Succubus ( 2 blasters )

HQ – Commander Shadow sun W/ 3 shield drones

Elite 1 – 3 Crisis Suits W/ Missile Pods & Burst cannons W/ 2 Shield Drones

Elite 2 – 3 Crisis Suits W/ Missile Pods & Burst cannons W/ 2 Shield Drones

Troop 1 – 6 Fire Warriors in a Devilfish

Troop 2 – 6 Fire Warriors in a Devilfish

Heavy Support 1 – 3 Broadsides

Heavy Support 2 – 3 Broadsides

This army had some pretty good shooty aspects to it. We knew that the broadsides and crisis suits could put enough hurting on us to allow the wyches to get close enough to put a hurt on us. Lucky for us we managed to get turn 1. We deployed really close together in the middle of the table and they deployed really tight in a corner using a building to block line of sight with most of there tanks.

Scout move: I used the scout move to get my valk close to there Jetbikes that they wanted to try to flank us with. I put a vet squad W/ melta's in the valk and I managed to get with in 12” of them with my scout move. I managed to put my vendetta into a place were his broadsides would not get a cover save. The tried to hide behind the building because they forgot about our scout move.

Our Turn 1: The valk moved 12” and the vets got out. The valk then pointed at the other squad of jetbikes. Jon got his fire warriors out of two of his devilfish and started to move 12” towards the building that they held up in. Our entire army pointed at the building to start to suppress as much fire as we could. Lucky for Jon and I this was a very good turn for us. My vets managed to wipe out the first Jetbike squad. After this the valk managed to get the other squad down to 1 bike and the Succubus. The Vendetta was earning its points by killing two broadsides ( he also failed his moral test bye bye broadsides ). Jon used his devil fish to get the remaining bike squad down to just the succubus. Jon fired his 4 broadsides at the full squad of broadsides and managed to get two of them down. Turn one we managed to get rid of 5 of there 6 broadsides so both of us were very happy.

There turn 1: The Jetbike succubus managed to charge and kill the vet squad that came out of the valk and the valk itself was taken down sadly by the remaining broadside. All four of the raider moved 12” and fired there dark lances but Jon made his 4 up cover save thnx for D pods. The crisis suits fired there missile pods but did not successful kill anything. Liliths squad and another wytch squad got out to try to assult the two empty Devil fish but had fleet rolls of 1 and 2 and then found themselves out of assault range by only 1 inch each.

Our turn 2: Jons HQ deep striked in and flamed a squad of wytches to death while my vendetta managed to finish off there final broadside. Our medusa's were finally in place to start dropping pie plates and managed to stun one of the raiders and destroyed another. Jon managd to finish off the Succubus on the bike with his devil fish. We knew that the crisis suits would be a small problem so we wanted to focus all of our fire power on the Dark Eldar. We managed to finish off another tank with the broadsides and kill Liltihs squad also this turn.

There turn 2: Shadow sun got close enough to destroy one of the empty devilfish and another wytch squad charged a squad of 6 fire warriors that we put out to slow down there wytches. Lucky for u they were unable to kill the Tau HQ with the crisis suits because it earned us another battle point. There other squad of Wytches got out but failed to get into the assault.

Our turn 3: My Vendetta managed to kill a raider while the medusa's and jons broadsides managed to kill the other raiders. We shot the rest of our fire power at the wytches and managed to finish off the Dark Eldar. At this time they had all of there crisis suits and there two devil fish with 6 fire dragons in each.

There turn 3: They moved out with there devil fish just hoping to get a few more kill points and shot everything at a squad of 6 fire warriors but Jon was just making those cover saves like it was gods will. After this we called it.

The people that we played against were two very good guys. We had a fun time and talked a lot before and after the tournament with them. I would play them again anytime.

We got 23 points for this round.

Round 2 coming soon....